Pixie Investigation With Mr. Erwin Saunders.

[BIAD]

...The first video in this set, the one that kept flashing "or her" onscreen, set me to wondering - for all his skill
and good fortune, Erwin seems to never have captured a FEMALE pixie on film, and I have to wonder why...

It could be that due the current over-the-top political correctness that's trending, Erwin and Tom are bending the
knee to it in hopes of not pissing-off any passing progressive! The viewer count on all the videos is low and being
passive with the small audience they have, may have been seen as a good move.

Ninurta

'...I have downloaded every single one of Erwin's videos I could find, and saved them to a local drive so that I can
step through them frame by frame to look for glitches and the like, and so far have not found a one.

The lighting, focus, contrast, edges, etc are exactly what one would expect if it were real. Admittedly, I'm no CGI expert,
and could never make a dime at it, but the work looks phenomenal to me, even frame by frame!...'

I agree, the effects really work. And this is what puzzles me.
The subject matter aside, if it is a style of self-advertising in order to display skills in movie-making, would loading a video
on YouTube really attract the interest of those who work in that industry?

The fifteen videos -to date, don't offer many examples of special effects and tend to lean more towards Erwin's stumbling
character. Admittedly, just like the first Jaws movie, you keep the audience hungry with only glimpses of the monster, but
can Mr. Saunders' act continue to hold the audience's attention?
That's assuming he's acting -of course!

If the goal is to promote one's movie-skills, then it will only be Tom that benefits. Erwin has hinted in the past that it is
London-based Tom that has advised him on how to behave in front of the camera and like others here, I seriously doubt
the elderly Mr. Saunders is the CGI expert. And I say that with respect to him.

The scenes involving Erwin attempting to crouch beneath a slab of rock and hide himself with the camo-netting are only
slightly humorous if the viewer has become used to the investigator's manner. It works to some extent, but if all of this
is a self-promotion campaign of video editing and effects, would Erwin's antics also add to Tom's prowess in film-making?

What is weirdly rational in all of this is Mystic's comments. If you accept the premise that whatever the videos show you
are real, then it all falls into place and the continuity makes sense. Which again, is the mark of a good filmmaker.

It's a conundrum!

[BIAD]

I think I found out why Pixies and Gnomes are rare about the countryside these days.

[Mystic Wanderer]

I think I found out why Pixies and Gnomes are rare about the countryside these days.

That could explain it!  

[Ninurta]

I dunno, man... I think that last video might've been faked. The reason I think that is because the pixies and gnomes 'round here shoot back, so it's a dangerous proposition to shoot at one - they've all got kin, and if you kill one, you might start a blood feud. Now, 'tis true enough that they only shoot back with bows and arrows, and their arrows are about the size of a broom straw, but DAMN those things can get annoying iffen yer hit by several dozen at once! A cactus or a porcupine ain't got nothin' on 'em!

.

[BIAD]

I dunno, man... I think that last video might've been faked...

That's YouTube you're denigrating and I seriously doubt such an upstanding company would allow fakery of any type on
their platform.

...The reason I think that is because the pixies and gnomes 'round here shoot back, so it's a dangerous proposition to shoot
at one - they've all got kin, and if you kill one, you might start a blood feud.

It may well be that in your area of the globe, the Gnomes and Pixies tote firearms and ride around in pick-up trucks, but the
accents in the video indicate that the two young -obviously terrified, men come from a rural area of Germany, where guns are
frowned upon because of... well, what happened in the their history.

From past discourse, I realise that 'Blood Feuds' are something that you -yourself and others in your mountainous abodes take
very seriously... and frequently. I'd advise that contacting the local constabulary when such disagreements arise, but I also recall
your temporarily-suspended run-in your law enforcement.
This could have a bearing.

Without sounding combative, maybe the gnomes and wee-folk that live around you aren't as bad-tempered as you?
 
With the current problems regarding immigration, this sort-of shoot first, shoot again and then empty the clip -tactic of interaction
with an unknown species (a tactic that some suggest Ninurta adheres to), isn't very European and I'm sure Mrs. Merkel and her
son -Emmanuel, would not condone such behavior.


(BIAD re-reads his post and smiles at the opportunity of leaving the EU!)

[Ninurta]

From past discourse, I realise that 'Blood Feuds' are something that you -yourself and others in your mountainous abodes take
very seriously... and frequently. I'd advise that contacting the local constabulary when such disagreements arise, but I also recall
your temporarily-suspended run-in your law enforcement.
This could have a bearing.

C'mon now! Everyone has to have a hobby!

I'm an old man now, and part of the old guard. When I was a teenager learning the ways of men, I only saw a police officer about twice a year, and even then they were just passing through on their way to somewhere else. We never, EVER called the constabulary, because even if we did, it would have taken them 45 minutes to get to us, and by then our bodies would have already started cooling, and all the police could have done would be fill out a report.

So we handled life on our own, without them.

Nowadays, police are everywhere here, thanks to Bill Clinton and Barack Obama. You can't hardly throw a rock without hitting one (and boy, do they get testy when hit with a rock!). There is one living just up the road from me... and I STILL never call them. Old habits die hard, I reckon. I just handle life, and folks announce themselves before they come visiting, so it's all good. Most everyone knows not to screw around my house nefariously, and we all get along pretty well for it. 

I've even got a sign in my yard soliciting votes for a gentleman running for the office of county sheriff - but I don't need him poking around in my business, as I can handle it on my own just fine, thank'ye very much (hat tip to the sheriff's department!).

Without sounding combative, maybe the gnomes and wee-folk that live around you aren't as bad-tempered as you?
 

No, they are. They're every bit as ill tempered as I am. What can I say? They learned from the Master of Ill Temper! It's likely my fault they are so grouchy and curmudgeonly. I tried to make amends by building little stick log cabins for them and leaving them around in the woods, but they usually just burn them to the ground and whoop and holler while dancing around the flames. I wish they'd put on clothes for that last part, but they've probably said the same about me.

With the current problems regarding immigration, this sort-of shoot first, shoot again and then empty the clip -tactic of interaction
with an unknown species (a tactic that some suggest Ninurta adheres to), isn't very European and I'm sure Mrs. Merkel and her
son -Emmanuel, would not condone such behavior.


(BIAD re-reads his post and smiles at the opportunity of leaving the EU!)

I'll have you know it's extremely European! We come from stout Scots-Irish and Welsh stock! I descend in a direct line from Charles Martel through Charlemagne, and another branch runs to Alfred the Great. Yet another runs to William the Conqueror, and on back to a thoroughly irascible set of Vikings. Another goes to Brian Boru, and still another traces to some McElwaine "Lairds of Grimmet" in Ayrshire Scotland - granted they were lowland Scots, and not badass highlanders like Gordi, but Scots all the same... All of 'em European, and all of 'em thoroughly grouchy when poked with a stick!

Where would Europe be without 44th great-grandpap Charles Martel dealing with an influx of "immigrants"? It would be in Arabia, that's where!

Why, I'm probably more European than those German girly-men, who, after all, got skeert enough to bus' a cap in some poor gnome's ass (well, several caps, it seems) who was just asking for directions to the nearest convenience store!


.

[BIAD]

...When I was a teenager learning the ways of men, I only saw a police officer about twice a year, and even then they were
just passing through on their way to somewhere else...

What remains unsaid to the reader is whether this 'seeing' of a passing police officer was from a position of idly standing at one's fence
or through a Leupold and Stevens Mark 6 scope, whilst prone on the ground. I'd like to think the former, but I think it's up to that same
reader to decide.

....Old habits die hard, I reckon. I just handle life, and folks announce themselves before they come visiting, so it's all good.
Most everyone knows not to screw around my house nefariously, and we all get along pretty well for it....

I would suggest that the wary glances at the unmarked mounds around your property during a neighbourhood get-together also helps.
 

'...I've even got a sign in my yard soliciting votes for a gentleman running for the office of county sheriff...

Again, another example of what isn't also said, a comment regarding the other placard in your yard. It doesn't say 'KEEP OUT' does it?
The word 'Run' is used and something about how any personal belongings on the body will be confiscated to fund future ammunition
requirements. If memory serves, I think the local paper did a write-up about it and the Reporter still hasn't been found.

[Gnomes] ...They're every bit as ill tempered as I am. What can I say?
They learned from the Master of Ill Temper! It's likely my fault they are so grouchy and curmudgeonly. I tried to make amends by building
little stick log cabins for them and leaving them around in the woods, but they usually just burn them to the ground and whoop and holler
while dancing around the flames. I wish they'd put on clothes for that last part, but they've probably said the same about me...

That's called 'baiting' and obviously, the Gnomes got wind of your ploy. You have the beard, try Erwin's tactics.

I'm surprised that your penchant for running through the woods naked is still ongoing after what happened with the over-sixties Ramblers
Association. Maureen -the President of the group, reported on their website that the way you 'pointed' when giving directions to the local
convenience store wasn't funny... not funny at all -she typed in caps.
And the photograph she posted wasn't very flattering either.
 

'...I'll have you know it's extremely European!
We come from stout Scots-Irish and Welsh stock! I descend in a direct line from Charles Martel through Charlemagne, and another
branch runs to Alfred the Great. Yet another runs to William the Conqueror, and on back to a thoroughly irascible set of Vikings.

Another goes to Brian Boru, and still another traces to some McElwaine "Lairds of Grimmet" in Ayrshire Scotland - granted they were
lowland Scots, and not badass highlanders like Gordi, but Scots all the same... All of 'em European, and all of 'em thoroughly grouchy
when poked with a stick! 

Couldn't you have thrown a poet in there or at least an English fop who enjoyed butterfly-collecting?
 

...Where would Europe be without 44th great-grandpap Charles Martel dealing with an influx of "immigrants"?
It would be in Arabia, that's where!

I looked-up Monsieur Martel in a Wikipedia piece in hope that words like 'diplomacy' and 'consideration' would be found there.
Sadly -and without any surprise, your ancestor's article stated:
"...According to a near-contemporary source, the Liber Historiae Francorum, Charles was "a warrior who was uncommonly
...effective in battle"

Very cosmopolitan.
 

Why, I'm probably more European than those German girly-men, who, after all, got skeert enough to bus' a cap in some poor
gnome's ass (well, several caps, it seems) who was just asking for directions to the nearest convenience store!

Ignoring the street-jive I believe you obtained from the movie 'Airplane!', you have not once mentioned the weather or referred
to the poor-diet of the English. Now that is European!

[BIAD]

Erwin encounters two types of aggressive phenomena, a arrow-firing Pixie tipped with hallucinating drug
and a nosy female walker who doubts the weapon he's brought in the name of defence.

Like Samson, Erwin is sheared and controlled by woman.
It's a war out there.

[guohua]

Now that was an Awesome little arrow, if he made it, that was very skillfully done.

[gordi]

Erwin encounters two types of aggressive phenomena, a arrow-firing Pixie tipped with hallucinating drug
and a nosy female walker who doubts the weapon he's brought in the name of defence.

Like Samson, Erwin is sheared and controlled by woman.
It's a war out there.

Methinks Erwin has found out where the forest mushrooms grow...

[guohua]

Erwin encounters two types of aggressive phenomena, a arrow-firing Pixie tipped with hallucinating drug
and a nosy female walker who doubts the weapon he's brought in the name of defence.

Like Samson, Erwin is sheared and controlled by woman.
It's a war out there.

Methinks Erwin has found out where the forest mushrooms grow...

I think you are RIGHT! 

[BIAD]

Anyone here find it strange that Ninurta earlier wrote:

"I dunno, man... I think that last video might've been faked.
The reason I think that is because the pixies and gnomes 'round here shoot back, 
so it's a dangerous proposition to shoot at one..."

And then poor Mr. Saunders takes an arrow to the neck?
Could it be that Erwin is peering into our little world of pixie-pondering and wishes to calm a fellow
woods-runner's doubts or could it be that these volatile woodland creatures have accessed the internet?

I must agree with Gordi as well, I think Erwin has discovered a growth of those 'special' mushrooms.

[Ninurta]

Anyone here find it strange that Ninurta earlier wrote:

"I dunno, man... I think that last video might've been faked.
The reason I think that is because the pixies and gnomes 'round here shoot back, 
so it's a dangerous proposition to shoot at one..."

And then poor Mr. Saunders takes an arrow to the neck?
Could it be that Erwin is peering into our little world of pixie-pondering and wishes to calm a fellow
woods-runner's doubts or could it be that these volatile woodland creatures have accessed the internet?

I must agree with Gordi as well, I think Erwin has discovered a growth of those 'special' mushrooms.

It could be one of a couple of things, or some combination thereof - I've noticed my internet usage to be a bit higher than one would expect, as if it were being tapped - by pixies, perhaps - and then again I have also noticed one particularly bold pixie lurking around my mailbox... they might be communicating with their British cousins by postal service, giving them tips on how to keep Erwin away from their habitats.

OR - it could be that Erwin is monitoring this feed. Coincidentally, perhaps, since I mentioned downloading his videos to a local drive for analysis, I can no longer download them. That ability has been blocked. It's very annoying, as YouTube doesn't allow for the display in all their glorious full resolution via the web. Very annoying.

The interloping lady was amusing. She thought Erwin might be shooting animals with a NERF GUN? I don't know what she's using to think with, but "brain" is not the correct answer! Erwin is far too nice. I know an old curmudgeonly woods-runner who would have told her to piss off and get scarce before he shot HER in the ass with that Nerf Gun!

... but I doubt she would have accosted me any way after she noticed how I was dressed... or undressed, as the case may be... her running away screaming would likely not have anything to do with being shot in the ass with a Nerf Gun. I doubt she would have even noticed the Nerf Gun before fleeing...

.

[BIAD]

It could be one of a couple of things, or some combination thereof - I've noticed my internet usage to be a bit higher than one would
expect, as if it were being tapped - by pixies, perhaps - and then again I have also noticed one particularly bold pixie lurking around
my mailbox... they might be communicating with their British cousins by postal service, giving them tips on how to keep Erwin away
from their habitats...

If either of what you're suggesting has merit, then it seems members of Rogue Nation also interacting with the diminutive people
of the British woodland and since many of our group are American... have you asked the EU for permission?!!
And being Britain, no doubt a licence will be involved!

If the postal service is being utilised, could this also back-up information mentioned in the 'Swindon-Alien' case from the eighties
where the Royal Mail was used to communicate withe SCUFORI?
And since we're enduring 21st century progressivism at the moment, should we use the words 'postal service' instead of 'mail'...?
Remember, the colour of standard envelopes is white too!

OR - it could be that Erwin is monitoring this feed. Coincidentally, perhaps, since I mentioned downloading his videos to a local drive
for analysis, I can no longer download them. That ability has been blocked. It's very annoying, as YouTube doesn't allow for the display
in all their glorious full resolution via the web. Very annoying.

That'll be Tom, the brains of the outfit. As Erwin's fame grows, the younger man -who likes his tech, knows that bridling the amount
of investigative access to this pixie-research will not only ensure the small beings will be given time to adjust to the stardom, it also
gives Erwin time to acquire a decent shirt.
(Gaawd, leave his hair alone!)

The interloping lady was amusing. She thought Erwin might be shooting animals with a NERF GUN? I don't know what she's using to
think with, but "brain" is not the correct answer! Erwin is far too nice. I know an old curmudgeonly woods-runner who would have told
her to piss off and get scarce before he shot HER in the ass with that Nerf Gun!

The nosy Rambler or walker -yer' know, the ones you terrify when they pass by your property?, well she sounds like a upper-middle
class 'homemaker' who enjoys a scone and a cup of tea at 4 o'clock in the afternoon and her dog is called 'Doodles'.
She probably 'does lunch' with other ladies on a Wednesday to break up the week and believes everything reported by the BBC.

Hence, a Nerf Gun is a gun and guns are used by those grubby folk who deliver cocaine to her husband's friends in Chipping Norton.
In the woman's mind, guns are the preferred item of criminals with rough accents and a bad taste in clothes and music.

Her friend -Margot, has told her of such deplorable villains when they were both shopping in Oxford Street and from what she's gathered,
many of these seedy folk don't know who Jane Eyre is or even feel better helping the coloured people by employing them.
Good grief, some of them don't even get their groceries delivered!

Guns are bad unless you're a landowner and have to save your cows and sheep from packs of wild foxes.

... but I doubt she would have accosted me any way after she noticed how I was dressed... or undressed, as the case may be...
her running away screaming would likely not have anything to do with being shot in the ass with a Nerf Gun.
I doubt she would have even noticed the Nerf Gun before fleeing...

Careful, these types of 'prim-and-proper' ladies like to occasionally dip their toe into the world of real men who dig holes
and kill animals with their bare hands. It makes them shiver with excitement just thinking about it!



Yes, she may have fled at the sight of your outdoor appearance at first, but who's to say she wouldn't have meandered
back to the trail where you were setting traps for people animals and asked if she could touch your beard?

Maybe after a couple of these encounters, you-too, could be enduring such dominant questioning that Mr. Saunders went
through and requests for using a saucer when you're drinking your tea would become the norm?!
It is 2019, after all.

[Ninurta]

If either of what you're suggesting has merit, then it seems members of Rogue Nation also interacting with the diminutive people
of the British woodland and since many of our group are American... have you asked the EU for permission?!!
And being Britain, no doubt a licence will be involved!

No, I've not asked the EU for permission. My theory is, "if you don't ask, they can't say no", and it has worked for me so far... Someone once said "it's easier to ask for forgiveness than it is to ask permission", but I have not, and do not plan to, ask for either.

And since we're enduring 21st century progressivism at the moment, should we use the words 'postal service' instead of 'mail'...?
Remember, the colour of standard envelopes is white too!

Tsk, tsk! You have not plumbed the depths of Progressivism far enough. "Mail" is pronounced far too close to "male" to be permissibly used in the 21st century. Clearly, the wee folk would not be using standard envelopes, so as not to run afoul of the tender sensibilities of the modern era. "Off white" would of course be as close as they would get, and even that might be a bit too close.

Guns are bad unless you're a landowner and have to save your cows and sheep from packs of wild foxes.

Completely understood. That is, in fact, why I have stacks of 40 round magazines for my AR-15. One never knows when he may be subject to an attack by hordes of rampaging rabid rabbits around here. 'Tis better to have it and not need it than need it and not have it...

Careful, these types of 'prim-and-proper' ladies like to occasionally dip their toe into the world of real men who dig holes
and kill animals with their bare hands. It makes them shiver with excitement just thinking about it!



Yes, she may have fled at the sight of your outdoor appearance at first, but who's to say she wouldn't have meandered
back to the trail where you were setting traps for people animals and asked if she could touch your beard?

Maybe after a couple of these encounters, you-too, could be enduring such dominant questioning that Mr. Saunders went
through and requests for using a saucer when you're drinking your tea would become the norm?!
It is 2019, after all.

True enough, but it's been my experience that they quickly grow bored, and like a drug addict, seek ever increasing doses. That young lady in the images above - is she spoken for? I bet I could have her wearing nothing but uncured bear hides and howling at the moon inside of 3 hours!

With women of this sort, saucers are best used by being tossed in the air to demonstrate your proficiency at shattering them before they hit the ground by action of a dart fired from your holstered Nerf Gun - chicks dig that!

.

[BIAD]

'...True enough, but it's been my experience that they quickly grow bored, and like a drug addict, seek ever increasing doses.
That young lady in the images above - is she spoken for? I bet I could have her wearing nothing but uncured bear hides
and howling at the moon inside of 3 hours!

With women of this sort, saucers are best used by being tossed in the air to demonstrate your proficiency at shattering them
before they hit the ground by action of a dart fired from your holstered Nerf Gun - chicks dig that!

I believe you, I've known such ladies! One minute they're flicking through the pages of Fox & Hounds and the next,
they're demanding a 'liaison' in the barn and emphasising the point with a riding-crop against her thigh!
Oh yes, I recall those days. All horse sweat and "Yes Ma'am".

Poor Erwin wouldn't stand a chance.

The female in question is this one arriving from the stairs.  (Oh and by the way, Otto/Harvey is correct!)

[Ninurta]

I believe you, I've known such ladies! One minute they're flicking through the pages of Fox & Hounds and the next,
they're demanding a 'liaison' in the barn and emphasising the point with a riding-crop against her thigh!
Oh yes, I recall those days. All horse sweat and "Yes Ma'am".

Poor Erwin wouldn't stand a chance.

I choose to believe Erwin is made of sterner stuff than either you or I may realize, and think he would do just fine. I would bet he can "yes ma'am!" with the best of us, and employ just the proper inflection to keep her guessing whether he were serious, being facetious, or terrified - but keeping her unable to determine exactly which. Chicks dig that, too! Not knowing drives 'em nuts!

The female in question is this one arriving from the stairs.  (Oh and by the way, Otto/Harvey is correct!)

I must revise my estimate - I bet I could have her wearing nothing but uncured bear skins and baying at the moon in under an hour and a half!

Without even using using the necklace...

.

[Wallfire]

I know its just me , but i feel a little sad that he brought weapons of any sort into the videos

[BIAD]

I know its just me , but i feel a little sad that he brought weapons of any sort into the videos

Fear not, my dear Wallfire, I'm sure Erwin has an ace up his sleeve (or a script) that will
allay the viewer's concerns of possible woodland war with Mr. Saunders evolving to John
J. Rambo and levelling the foliage with his wrath.

At the very least, we may get to see the bearded gent get high again and maybe tell us
that Tom is his dealer!

[guohua]

@"BIAD" 
I think maybe your friend Mr. Saunders needs to get his passport and travel here to see and get a picture of Pixies and maybe even Bigfoot or an Alien or two.