Shoutbox Wannabe.

[hounddoghowlie]

What do you call it when you don't want to something that you want to do?

Sounds confusing, I guess because it is.

I have a dear friend that I would do almost anything for, and I "know" he would do anything for me. He has gone over the top, beyond the pale, and beyond the beyond, for me on numerous occasions.

He needs a ride to the airport tomorrow. Usually no big deal. But this time he has an early flight. He has to be at the airport by 5:30 am. It will take me 30 minutes to get to his house, get the car packed, and get on the road, and an hour to get to the airport. So I will have to get up around three am. To make sure I get him there on time. 

Again this would be no big deal, if I could just go back home and go back to bed for a couple of hours. By the time I get home it will be about 7am, and I have to be at work by 8am and I am on till midnight.

Again, no big deal, except I have been having a hard time sleeping soundly, which means I wake up three to four times at night, I have Mom on a monitor because she has night terrors and walks in her sleep. 

This has been going on for so long it is starting to wear me down. Being old as dirt is not helping in the least little bit.

Anyway, now that back story is out of the way, I want to take him, I really do, and I would be very much be offended if he did not ask to take him.

Yet, I really don't want to get up at 4am to start a 20 hour day. It could easily bleed into the next day. I am on 16 hour call on Friday, and we have been unusually busy.

This of course is just a lame ass excuse, to assuage my guilt for not being over joyous about helping out a friend.

I guess there are a few names that would be fitting, just wondering what you would call it.

other than dread, can't think of anything else.

you know like when you say i want to do what he asked me, but i dread all the hasle it gonna be.