Thread Rating:
  • 3 Vote(s) - 5 Average
  • 1
  • 2
  • 3
  • 4
  • 5
The Blonde Golfer
#1
Quote:
Quote:
Quote:The Blonde Golfer
  
 A father, son and grandson went to the country club for their weekly round of golf.

Just as they reached the first tee, a beautiful young blonde woman carrying her bag of clubs approached them.

[i]She explained that the member who brought her to the club for a round of golf had an emergency that called him away and asked the trio whether she could join them.


Naturally, the guys all agreed.
[/i]

[i]Smiling, the blonde thanked them and said, "Look, fellows, I work in a
[/i] topless bar as a dancer, so nothing shocks me anymore. If any of you want to smoke cigars, have a beer, bet, swear, tell off-colour stories or do anything that you normally do when playing a round together, go ahead.  But I enjoy playing golf, and consider myself pretty good at it, so don't try to coach me on how to play my shots."


[i]With that the guys agreed to relax and invited her to
[/i] drive first.

All eyes were fastened on her shapely behind as she bent to place her ball on the tee.
 
She then took her driver and hit the ball 270 yards down the middle, right in front of the green.

[i]The father's mouth was agape. "That was beautiful," he
[/i] said.

[i]The blonde put her driver away and said, "I really didn't get into it, and I faded it a little."


After the three guys hit their drives and their second
[/i] shots, the blonde took out an eight iron and lofted the ball within five feet of the hole. (She was closest to the pin.)

[i]The son said, "Damn, lady, you played that perfectly."
[/i]

The blonde frowned and said, "It was a little weak, but even an easy seven would have been too much club. I've left a tricky little putt."
She then tapped in the five-footer for a birdie.

[i]Having the honours, she drove first on the second hole,
[/i] knocked the heck out of the ball, and it landed nearly 300 yards away smack in the middle of the fairway.

[i]For the rest of the round the statuesque blonde
[/i] continued to amaze the guys, quietly and methodically shooting for par or less on every hole.

[i]When they arrived at the 18th green, the blonde was three under par, and had a very nasty 12-foot putt on an undulating green for a par.


She turned to the three guys and said, "I really want
[/i] to thank you all for not acting like a bunch of chauvinists and telling me what club to use or how to play a shot, but I need this putt for a 69 and I'd really like to break 70 on this course. If any one of you can tell me how to make par on this hole, I'll take him back to my apartment, pour some 35-year-old Single Malt Mill Scotch in him, fix him a steak dinner and then show him a very good time the rest of the night."
The yuppie son jumped at the thought!
 
He strolled across the green, carefully eyeing the line of the putt and finally said, "Honey, aim about 6 inches to the right of the hole and hit it firm. It will get over that little hump and break right into the cup."

[i]The father knelt down and sighted the putt using his
[/i] putter as a plumb. "Don't listen to the kid, darling'. You want to hit it softly 10 inches to the right and let it run left down that little hogback, so it falls into the cup."

[i]The old gray-haired grandfather walked over to the blonde's ball, picked it up and handed it to her and said, "That's a gimme, sweetheart."


The blonde smiled and said, "Your car or mine?"
[/i]

 
REMEMBER . . . 
 
OLD AGE AND TREACHERY WILL OVERCOME YOUTH AND SKILL EVERY TIME!
#2
Sorry about that as the first posting was to dark..Fixed it
#3
(03-24-2022, 04:36 AM)727Sky Wrote:
Quote:
Quote:
Quote:The Blonde Golfer

From me and my better-half.
smallroflmao smallroflmao smallroflmao smallroflmao smallroflmao smallrofl
Edith Head Gives Good Wardrobe. 
#4
Funnily enough I have three blond lesbian adolescent Ukrainians living with me now.

I receive £350 a month to house them...

And £3000 a month on my hidden camera website.

Erm... Anyone seen my coat? I will show myself out thank you very much...
I still don't understand why the Kamikaze pilots wore helmets!
#5
(03-24-2022, 04:36 AM)727Sky Wrote: The old gray-haired grandfather walked over to the blonde's ball, picked it up and handed it to her and said, "That's a gimme, sweetheart."

The blonde smiled and said, "Your car or mine?"
 
REMEMBER . . . 
 
OLD AGE AND TREACHERY WILL OVERCOME YOUTH AND SKILL EVERY TIME!




I don't get it?
#6
(03-24-2022, 02:42 PM)Grace Wrote:
(03-24-2022, 04:36 AM)727Sky Wrote: The old gray-haired grandfather walked over to the blonde's ball, picked it up and handed it to her and said, "That's a gimme, sweetheart."

The blonde smiled and said, "Your car or mine?"
 
REMEMBER . . . 
 
OLD AGE AND TREACHERY WILL OVERCOME YOUTH AND SKILL EVERY TIME!




I don't get it?

I don't either.
I am WonderCow....hear me moo!
#7
(03-24-2022, 02:42 PM)Grace Wrote: I don't get it?

The grandfather did and a steak-dinner too!
tinyhuh
Edith Head Gives Good Wardrobe. 
#8
(03-24-2022, 02:45 PM)BIAD Wrote:
(03-24-2022, 02:42 PM)Grace Wrote: I don't get it?

The grandfather did and a steak-dinner too!
tinyhuh


That part is clear... 

Something to do with rules of golfing then?
#9
(03-24-2022, 10:37 AM)Rodinus Wrote: Funnily enough I have three blond lesbian adolescent Ukrainians living with me now.

I receive £350 a month to house them...

And £3000 a month on my hidden camera website.

Erm... Anyone seen my coat? I will show myself out thank you very much...

                                                     smallrofl
Once A Rogue, Always A Rogue!
[Image: attachment.php?aid=936]
#10
tinylaughing tinylaughing tinylaughing tinylaughing tinylaughing tinylaughing tinylaughing tinylaughing tinylaughing tinylaughing tinylaughing tinylaughing
"I be ridin' they be hatin'."
-Abraham Lincoln
#11
(03-24-2022, 02:47 PM)Grace Wrote:
(03-24-2022, 02:45 PM)BIAD Wrote:
(03-24-2022, 02:42 PM)Grace Wrote: I don't get it?

The grandfather did and a steak-dinner too!
tinyhuh


That part is clear... 

Something to do with rules of golfing then?

A gimme meaning you don't actually make the put just pick the ball up and score it as in because it was an obvious make. For example if your ball were to land a half inch from the hole, you don't really need to make that half inch put. Some people will just pick up the ball instead of going through the motions to tap it in. It's a gimme. Or give me.
#12
(03-24-2022, 10:32 PM)FauxMulder Wrote:
(03-24-2022, 02:47 PM)Grace Wrote:
(03-24-2022, 02:45 PM)BIAD Wrote:
(03-24-2022, 02:42 PM)Grace Wrote: I don't get it?

The grandfather did and a steak-dinner too!
tinyhuh


That part is clear... 

Something to do with rules of golfing then?

A gimme meaning you don't actually make the put just pick the ball up and score it as in because it was an obvious make. For example if your ball were to land a half inch from the hole, you don't really need to make that half inch put. Some people will just pick up the ball instead of going through the motions to tap it in. It's a gimme. Or give me.


Okay, that makes sense then because she didn't like being told how to golf. So okay, he won her over. 

Thanks for the explanation!
#13
(03-24-2022, 10:40 PM)Grace Wrote:
(03-24-2022, 10:32 PM)FauxMulder Wrote:
(03-24-2022, 02:47 PM)Grace Wrote:
(03-24-2022, 02:45 PM)BIAD Wrote:
(03-24-2022, 02:42 PM)Grace Wrote: I don't get it?

The grandfather did and a steak-dinner too!
tinyhuh


That part is clear... 

Something to do with rules of golfing then?

A gimme meaning you don't actually make the put just pick the ball up and score it as in because it was an obvious make. For example if your ball were to land a half inch from the hole, you don't really need to make that half inch put. Some people will just pick up the ball instead of going through the motions to tap it in. It's a gimme. Or give me.


Okay, that makes sense then because she didn't like being told how to golf. So okay, he won her over. 

Thanks for the explanation!

Close lol. It was a hard shot. The old man called it a gimme just so he could go back to her place.
#14
(03-24-2022, 10:48 PM)FauxMulder Wrote: Close lol. It was a hard shot. The old man called it a gimme just so he could go back to her place.


Ahhh okay... Lol. Yep that sounds like an old man!


Forum Jump:


Users browsing this thread: 1 Guest(s)