06-04-2018, 07:33 AM
Meh.
Every day of my life, I leave a continuous trail of DNA that is a minimum of 8 miles long. If "they" wanted it, then "they" got it years ago. Mysteriously, I seem to still be alive.
I did have my DNA tested recently, and discovered there are no genetic weaknesses or proclivity to disease that was exploitable in a "kill Ninurta" scenario. They'll just have to content themselves with coming at me, bro, with a knife, gun, or crowbar in a decidedly mundane bid to end my days. As a matter of fact, if we discount the aforementioned scenario involving knives, guns, and /or crowbars... or the occasional rampant bus intent on mayhem... I'm expected to live a fair bit longer than the average human, a trait that oddly enough got passed on to my son. He got none of my Indian DNA, yet inherited the live-forever genes. Science can be a fickle mistress.
It was also discovered that I have more Neanderthal inheritance than the average, substantially more, and that I have an odd and haunting connection with ancient Siberian mammoth hunters from 45,000 years ago. It's still a mystery as to how that much of their DNA survived and wound up in a modern human after all that time. Maybe something to do with those live-forever genes.
Oh, I can still be killed - but one would meet with more success on that front by poking me with a sharp stick than by attacking my molecules. I'm given to understand that I can eat buckets of microbes awash in enzyme sauce without ill effect.
The experiment - if that's what it was - failed, and failed dismally. So dramatically so that there was discussion around the notion of not releasing the results of my test at all, not even to me, and slapping a "Classified - National Security" label on it before hiding it in a vault somewhere. After 4 days of debate, the notion was overruled. The consensus was that no one would believe it anyhow, so what was the harm?
I'm not superman, according to the results, but I AM mighty nigh indestructable... unless you have a knife, gun, crowbar, pointy stick, or errant bus.
I guess I probably ought to be on the lookout for those... as well as Mormon cloning labs churning out copy after copy of me in a bid to take over the world.
.
Every day of my life, I leave a continuous trail of DNA that is a minimum of 8 miles long. If "they" wanted it, then "they" got it years ago. Mysteriously, I seem to still be alive.
I did have my DNA tested recently, and discovered there are no genetic weaknesses or proclivity to disease that was exploitable in a "kill Ninurta" scenario. They'll just have to content themselves with coming at me, bro, with a knife, gun, or crowbar in a decidedly mundane bid to end my days. As a matter of fact, if we discount the aforementioned scenario involving knives, guns, and /or crowbars... or the occasional rampant bus intent on mayhem... I'm expected to live a fair bit longer than the average human, a trait that oddly enough got passed on to my son. He got none of my Indian DNA, yet inherited the live-forever genes. Science can be a fickle mistress.
It was also discovered that I have more Neanderthal inheritance than the average, substantially more, and that I have an odd and haunting connection with ancient Siberian mammoth hunters from 45,000 years ago. It's still a mystery as to how that much of their DNA survived and wound up in a modern human after all that time. Maybe something to do with those live-forever genes.
Oh, I can still be killed - but one would meet with more success on that front by poking me with a sharp stick than by attacking my molecules. I'm given to understand that I can eat buckets of microbes awash in enzyme sauce without ill effect.
The experiment - if that's what it was - failed, and failed dismally. So dramatically so that there was discussion around the notion of not releasing the results of my test at all, not even to me, and slapping a "Classified - National Security" label on it before hiding it in a vault somewhere. After 4 days of debate, the notion was overruled. The consensus was that no one would believe it anyhow, so what was the harm?
I'm not superman, according to the results, but I AM mighty nigh indestructable... unless you have a knife, gun, crowbar, pointy stick, or errant bus.
I guess I probably ought to be on the lookout for those... as well as Mormon cloning labs churning out copy after copy of me in a bid to take over the world.
.
Diogenes was eating bread and lentils for supper. He was seen by the philosopher Aristippus, who lived comfortably by flattering the king.
Said Aristippus, ‘If you would learn to be subservient to the king you would not have to live on lentils.’ Said Diogenes, ‘Learn to live on lentils and you will not have to be subservient to the king.’
Said Aristippus, ‘If you would learn to be subservient to the king you would not have to live on lentils.’ Said Diogenes, ‘Learn to live on lentils and you will not have to be subservient to the king.’