Say hello to my little friend

[Ninurta]

I hate spiders, and this house is eat up with them, just like the last house I lived in, so I have to get used to it, I tend to "move them out of my space", but that usually involves removing them from my universe. There is a big one living around my basement stairs at the moment that I've not been able to do anything with. I tried to shoot it 3 times, but the bugger is quick. No shit, I tried to shoot it - but with a CO2 pistol, not a powder one. My flamethrower is still in the shop. Since I've not been able to kill it, I've decided to adopt it as a pet, and maybe attack train it. I have named it "Super Rack-Nid", on account of how it can move faster than a speeding bullet...

This is a photo of Super Rack-Nid. I took a couple days ago. He (or maybe she - I ain't got close enough to see it's dangly bits) is spanning the edge of a 2x10 stair stringer in the photo:




Say hello to my little friend.

.

[BIAD]

My Missus will rival your fear of them and even breathed "Oh Gawd!" when she saw the photo!
They don't bother myself and that's why -just as I get comfortable and ready to type another episode of
Peggy Powler, she'll hiss and point at a dark shape hunkered in the corner of the room.

No... it's not BIAD playing silly-buggers, but a spider that's come in out the cold and I have to attempt to
save it before her lethal slipper executes the poor thing.

But she's just admitted from the past images of your surrounding terrain you kindly provided, it would be
the snakes that would prohibit her from falling asleep!!

[Ninurta]

My Missus will rival your fear of them and even breathed "Oh Gawd!" when she saw the photo!
They don't bother myself and that's why -just as I get comfortable and ready to type another episode of
Peggy Powler, she'll hiss and point at a dark shape hunkered in the corner of the room.

No... it's not BIAD playing silly-buggers, but a spider that's come in out the cold and I have to attempt to
save it before her lethal slipper executes the poor thing.

But she's just admitted from the past images of your surrounding terrain you kindly provided, it would be
the snakes that would prohibit her from falling asleep!!

Oh, I'm scared of them alright, but it's hereditary I think - my Dear Old Dad never suffered one to live a-tall. He never even went for a shoe or other implement of destruction, he just immediately squashed them under a thumb on sight, like a cobra striking. No thought for it, just immediate reaction.

A few years ago, my niece had a bedroom in the basement here. She was going to come upstairs one day when all of a sudden, there was a blood-curdling scream, and then she started yelling for me. I had no idea what sort of nefarious things were afoot, so I went running to see what was wrong. There she was, gasping for air and pointing at a Huntsman Spider sitting complacently in the middle of the floor, effectively blocking her passage. By that point, she could no longer even speak, just gasp for air and point.

The spider WAS a big-'un, quite a bit bigger than the one imaged above. It was probably around 5 1/2 or 6 inches across the legs. I glared at the spider, and it sat there and glared back at me, standing it's ground. I glared some more. The spider glared some more.

I glared.

The spider glared.

I heard, somewhere in the background, the theme from "The Good, The Bad, and The Ugly" start playing.

I glared some more.

The spider glared some more.

The Niece continued gasping and pointing.

I thought that maybe, just maybe, if I pounced quickly enough, I could squish it before it could carry me off without a saddle.

So I did.  I gave it both feet, all 180 pounds of me, all at once, and the spider was no more. Then I rode off into the sunset, still shaking and jittering.

Another time, in my previous house, I was just sitting there minding my own business in My Chair - the official one, the Big Ninurta Chair -  eating supper, when Grace suddenly started shrieking and gasping and pointing incoherently over my left shoulder. I immediately sprang out of the chair and turned around, all in one swift move, and there it was.

A big assed eight-legged freak, perched on the back of my chair, eyeing the plate which was still in my hand. When it first topped the back of the chair, Grace thought it was the cat climbing up there... until she realized it had too many legs for a cat, and hilarity ensued.

I have no idea what kind of spiders those monsters over there were. My sister called them "tarantulas", but I'm pretty sure that's not what they were. I just called them "saber-tooth spiders", on account of the giant fangs they bore. I have  images somewhere of those, too - close ups of those giant shiny black fangs. Nasty bastards. I beat that one to death with a shovel handle I had laying around.

Me and spiders, we have a history... and it ain't a good one. It's war to the death.

Now snakes, they occasionally get into the house, too. At the old house one afternoon, Grace was in the kitchen cooking supper when she started shrieking. She has just the cutest little shriek, like she ain't even trying at all. Anyhow, when she shrieks like that, I know something is up, so I went a-running, and there it was... a snake. In the kitchen. Swinging into action, I grabbed a machete, and a broom to use as a foil, and did battle with the dreadful beast, eventually slaying that dragon right there in the kitchen. Pinning it's head to the ground with the broom, I beheaded it as it tried it's damndest to coil around the broom and remove said obstruction from it's august personage.

The aforementioned niece found one in her bedroom in the basement here once. It was a tiny little thing, but she was shrieking for me, so I went to do battle once more. She was up in the middle of her bed, and would NOT set foot on the floor until the dragon was slain. I killed that one with a boar spear, and flung it harmlessly outside to complete it's death throes.

I guess I don't have the best history with snakes, either.

One day, perhaps, I'll tell the tale of giant spiders and giant snakes in a Central American jungle. But not today. it's only been 40 years or so, and the memories are still too fresh and raw...

.

[BIAD]

One day, perhaps, I'll tell the tale of giant spiders and giant snakes in a Central American jungle.
But not today. it's only been 40 years or so, and the memories are still too fresh and raw...

I wait -but not my wife, with bated breath!!

[VioletDove]

I used to be afraid of all spiders but I’m ok with most of them now as long as they aren’t close to me or in my house. I even put them outside now, unless I panic like I did the other day when I had one on my jacket. That one had me so nervous that later on when I was putting up my Halloween decorations I had a little anxiety when I was straightening out the legs on my furry creepy spider I hang by the door.

A couple of years ago I found what I thought was a dried up tarantula in our wood working building. Of course me being me and always poking things with a stick that was the first thing I did. It came alive! It was a wolf spider and thank God it didn’t have babies on it. I just let it have the place and didn’t go back until it was gone.

The only thing that never gets any mercy is a scorpion. I’ve been stung too many times. The other night my brother was over and I went to the kitchen. Well one was scurrying across my floor. I yelled for him because I didn’t have shoes on. He came in there and we took turns yelling and it got away. After awhile I see my cats attacking something in the dining room. I check it out, wearing shoes this time and it is a scorpion. I’m still hoping it was the same one I had seen earlier.

[Ninurta]

I used to be afraid of all spiders but I’m ok with most of them now as long as they aren’t close to me or in my house. I even put them outside now, unless I panic like I did the other day when I had one on my jacket. That one had me so nervous that later on when I was putting up my Halloween decorations I had a little anxiety when I was straightening out the legs on my furry creepy spider I hang by the door.

A couple of years ago I found what I thought was a dried up tarantula in our wood working building. Of course me being me and always poking things with a stick that was the first thing I did. It came alive! It was a wolf spider and thank God it didn’t have babies on it. I just let it have the place and didn’t go back until it was gone.

The only thing that never gets any mercy is a scorpion. I’ve been stung too many times. The other night my brother was over and I went to the kitchen. Well one was scurrying across my floor. I yelled for him because I didn’t have shoes on. He came in there and we took turns yelling and it got away. After awhile I see my cats attacking something in the dining room. I check it out, wearing shoes this time and it is a scorpion. I’m still hoping it was the same one I had seen earlier.

I have a UV flashlight to locate scorpions with. They fluoresce pretty brightly under UV light, and are east to pick out and eradicate.

Cleaning fluid does a number on spiders.I used to house 'em down with Mean Green and watch them gasp out their last breath.Who needs expensive bug spray? Spiders are not human, at least not like you or I. I'm not going to ask them politely to leave - I'm gonna violate the hell out of their civil rights until they die.

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[Kenzo]

What a beast   How can you even sleep there knowing that could sneak in to your bedroom .


I am scared of big spiders, luckely i have not seen any big here...."knocking on wood"


I was thinking this, but you cant burn your house can you.....

[Ninurta]

What a beast   How can you even sleep there knowing that could sneak in to your bedroom .


I am scared of big spiders, luckely i have not seen any big here...."knocking on wood"


I was thinking this, but you cant burn your house can you.....

Oh, I KNOW they've been in the bedroom.

A couple weeks ago, I was picking some stuff up off the floor that had fallen off Grace's nightstand. I looked down, and there just about a foot or so from my face was a big, hairy-legged beastie, probably about 3 inches (about 7 1/2 cm) across the legs. So, of course the only logical course of action was to shout "fuck ME!" and jump to get away from it, but in the process of doing so, I smacked my head on the nightstand, and that knocked even more stuff off of it.

That didn't put me in the best of moods. Matter of fact, it kinda pissed me off.

So I went and got the Mean Green, and spritzed the soinofagun, but he was pretty wiley, and jumped to avoid the cleaning fluid. Unfortunately for him, he ran under a candy wrapper where he couldn't see what was coming, and so I stomped him.

To add insult to injury, Grace was laughing her ass off the entire time this was happening. Sometimes, wimmen just got no sense of decorum at all.

---
I'd love to get one of those flying flamethrowers, but I've already got 4 drones here, and can't make a damned one of them go where I want it to, so that would probably be pretty dangerous for the entire neighborhood...

,

[Kenzo]

What a beast   How can you even sleep there knowing that could sneak in to your bedroom .


I am scared of big spiders, luckely i have not seen any big here...."knocking on wood"


I was thinking this, but you cant burn your house can you.....

Oh, I KNOW they've been in the bedroom.

A couple weeks ago, I was picking some stuff up off the floor that had fallen off Grace's nightstand. I looked down, and there just about a foot or so from my face was a big, hairy-legged beastie, probably about 3 inches (about 7 1/2 cm) across the legs. So, of course the only logical course of action was to shout "fuck ME!" and jump to get away from it, but in the process of doing so, I smacked my head on the nightstand, and that knocked even more stuff off of it.

That didn't put me in the best of moods. Matter of fact, it kinda pissed me off.

So I went and got the Mean Green, and spritzed the soinofagun, but he was pretty wiley, and jumped to avoid the cleaning fluid. Unfortunately for him, he ran under a candy wrapper where he couldn't see what was coming, and so I stomped him.

To add insult to injury, Grace was laughing her ass off the entire time this was happening. Sometimes, wimmen just got no sense of decorum at all.

---
I'd love to get one of those flying flamethrowers, but I've already got 4 drones here, and can't make a damned one of them go where I want it to, so that would probably be pretty dangerous for the entire neighborhood...

,

Your bedroom is war zone

I am lucky dude, i would lost my mind if see those big spiders in bedroom.

[Minstrel]

I hate spiders, and this house is eat up with them...
There is a big one living around my basement stairs at the moment that I've not been able to do anything with...
I have named it "Super Rack-Nid", on account of how it can move faster than a speeding bullet...

This is a photo of Super Rack-Nid...




Say hello to my little friend.

.

Pleased to make "Super Rack-Nid"'s acquaintance...this way. They do seem alien.

Is your niece a brunette?...like, maybe, Snow White?

In West Texas, at some point around Independence Day, tarantulas will migrate across the highway en masse...for only a few days. But, those few days make for an awesome sight, not to mention, a messy car.

Hope your little caped friend stays in his/her corner of the world, tending its own business. I've tried 'being nice' and giving them space...but the relationships rarely last too long - especially when they deliver a load of babies.

By the by - I didn't know Huntsmen were in the continental U.S. ... My daughter, who has been in Australia for the last two years, has had numerous encounters with some of that variety, and says that they are fast as lightning.

[Ninurta]

Pleased to make "Super Rack-Nid"'s acquaintance...this way. They do seem alien.

Is your niece a brunette?...like, maybe, Snow White?

In West Texas, at some point around Independence Day, tarantulas will migrate across the highway en masse...for only a few days. But, those few days make for an awesome sight, not to mention, a messy car.

Hope your little caped friend stays in his/her corner of the world, tending its own business. I've tried 'being nice' and giving them space...but the relationships rarely last too long - especially when they deliver a load of babies.

By the by - I didn't know Huntsmen were in the continental U.S. ... My daughter, who has been in Australia for the last two years, has had numerous encounters with some of that variety, and says that they are fast as lightning.

Nah, the niece is a blonde, which is the only explanation I can suss out for her Leftist political leanings. She didn't learn that from either her ma or her pa.

I kept an eye on him on those stairs for 3 days, which was an endless source of amusement for Grace, who was prone to make comments like "when you're done checking up on your pet, you can..." - fill in the blank with whatever she thought I needed to be doing at that instant. BUT - it hasn't been on the stairs now or a few days, which begs the question of just where IS it now?  No, I did NOT just look over my shoulder! Really!

Yup, those Huntsmen ARE remarkably fast given their size. That was the reason for all the hesitation and staring during the epic battle - I didn't want to miss, and was reasonably sure I would as soon as I moved. It's my understanding that they are now found on 6 of the 7 continents, being absent only from Antarctica. The largest spider on record leg span-wise is now a giant Huntsman spider found in a cave in Southeast Asia. While it is not as heavy or bulky as a giant Goliath Bird Eater tarantula, it edges the tarantula out in leg span at around 12 inches. The ones here, thankfully, are not that big, and top out at 6 or 7 inches across the legs for a really big one. Most are smaller, around 4 inches or so, and so can be taken out with only a bazooka or flamethrower, so we don't have to have pocket sized nuke grenades to deal with them.

There are also Parson spiders in this house. Tiny, shiny jet black things. Bitch of a painful bite, but not really all that dangerous. They are pretty shy, and I've only seen two of them here, but two was three too many for my taste.

AND we have "Daddy Long legs" spiders, allegedly one of the most potently poisonous spiders in the world, with enough venom per bite to kill 25,000 humans, but whose fangs are too short to penetrate human skin so, harmless really. Now, what WE always called "Daddy Long Legs" are not spiders at all - I have since learned they are called "Harvestmen" in the rest of the world. When I was a kid, we'd pick them up by one leg and chant "Daddy Long legs, Daddy long legs, which way are the cows?" and they would point with their single long leg in some direction as a response to being picked up. The last time I did that, years and years ago, the little miscreant doubled back on me and tried to lay the fang to my finger, which may be where my arachnophobia came from. I've not picked one up since that day, and that is the ONLY time I have ever even heard of one trying to bite someone - I'm just lucky like that I reckon.

No, the actual "Daddy Long Legs" is not one of those Harvestmen. It is, instead, a delicate, spindly filamentous organism that is hard to see unless you get it between yourself and a light source. They have long, thin, spindly and translucent legs and a tiny body for their size, and usually live in webs rather than patrolling the ground as hunting spiders do. Due to being as delicate as they are, they are easily destroyed with extreme prejudice.

There is also some kind of spider here that "dances" - it rolls along the ground like a dropped coin ambling and teetering along it's edges. And it jumps. I don't know what kind that is, either, and the ONLY other dancing spiders that move like that which I have been able to uncover live across the Atlantic, in the Sahara desert. No idea what the ones here are called. When I was a teenager, I had one chase me across the living room floor, wanting to dance with me I reckon. It would dance straight at me, then stop, gather itself for a jump, and jump at me. It would jump as high as my knees, and straight at me. So, every time it did that, I'd scoot backwards, and it would miss. About the third time it stopped to gather itself for a jump at me, I dropped a loose boot on it and put an end to the dance. Now, that was years and years ago, BUT they are still here, just rare I guess. I saw one about 3 or 4 years ago at work, dancing along a concrete walkway.

And Black Widows. We have enough of those to export them, if anyone else wants any. My garage is full of 'em. When I was working, the same walkway that I saw the dancing spider on had a hollow space under it where Black Widows lived. Once when it rained hard, water collected there and ran them out of their lair up onto the top of the walkway, and we killed 12 of them with bricks in the space of about 15 minutes. Another time, same place, I was outside on break, and there was a crap ton of new trainees out there also on break, and I saw one dangling from a web from the ceiling of an alcove, making way for a young lady's shoulder, one of the trainees. She was so new there - first day - that she didn't even know who I was. So I walked up to her, tapped her on the shoulder, and said " 'Scuse me miss - would you mind stepping three feet thataway?" She looked at me all weird, one of those "just who the hell are you?" looks, but complied, at which point I grabbed the web a couple feet above the widow, lowered it to the ground, and stepped on it. Folks talked about that for weeks, because I didn't freak out about it, nor did I panic her, until she saw what I was doing - I figured calm is better for escape than panic is, so I didn't say anything about what was up until they saw me grab the web, and followed that down to the widow, and hilarity ensued as they all ran in different directions.

For the benefit of @"BIAD"s missus, that building was also infested with snakes. I killed one in the lobby, and we found another in the west wing of the building, but it escaped into a crack in the concrete floor before we could kill it, so I filled that crack with Great Stuff foam insulation to prevent it's re-entry.

The things you have to do when you're a manager, to keep your workers safe!

.

[Kenzo]

   

You need to read Sun Tzu The art of war again , those pesky creatures have colony there , waiting D-day




 
Dont they hate essential oils...

[Ninurta]

You need to read Sun Tzu The art of war again , those pesky creatures have colony there , waiting D-day




 
Dont they hate essential oils...

I have heard they hate certain oils, such as spearmint and peppermint, but so does Grace, so hosing the house down with them is not an option, much as I would like for it to be!

.

[VioletDove]

I was thinking I had a picture of my wood building spider but couldn’t find one. So I asked my husband if he did and lucky for y’all he had several. It looks like it could be a good companion for @"Ninurta"s spider.

   

[ABNARTY]

Dude! Where do you live? The Amazon?

Put a saddle on that bugger.

[ABNARTY]

I was thinking I had a picture of my wood building spider but couldn’t find one. So I asked my husband if he did and lucky for y’all he had several. It looks like it could be a good companion for @"Ninurta"s spider.

Good gravy!!! Where do you live?

[VioletDove]

I was thinking I had a picture of my wood building spider but couldn’t find one. So I asked my husband if he did and lucky for y’all he had several. It looks like it could be a good companion for @"Ninurta"s spider.

Good gravy!!! Where do you live?

Oklahoma. 


It was one of the biggest spiders I’ve seen around here. That’s why I thought it was a dried up tarantula when I saw it. It was all curled up and wasn’t as hairy as any tarantula I’ve seen. I about killed myself tripping over stuff trying to get away after I poked it with that stick and it moved.

My husband just left it in there. Pretty sure he named it too. He was pretty sad when he went out there and it was gone. I was somewhat relieved though because I was making bird houses at the time and didn’t really care to hang out with it.

[ABNARTY]

I was thinking I had a picture of my wood building spider but couldn’t find one. So I asked my husband if he did and lucky for y’all he had several. It looks like it could be a good companion for @"Ninurta"s spider.

Good gravy!!! Where do you live?

Oklahoma. 


It was one of the biggest spiders I’ve seen around here. That’s why I thought it was a dried up tarantula when I saw it. It was all curled up and wasn’t as hairy as any tarantula I’ve seen. I about killed myself tripping over stuff trying to get away after I poked it with that stick and it moved.

My husband just left it in there. Pretty sure he named it too. He was pretty sad when he went out there and it was gone. I was somewhat relieved though because I was making bird houses at the time and didn’t really care to hang out with it.

Glad all ended well. 

I try really hard to overcome the spider wigglies. I let them be. They have a place here just like I do. But something like that would push me to my limits 

[Ninurta]

Dude! Where do you live? The Amazon?

Put a saddle on that bugger.

I live in the Appalachian Mountains at the far western tail of Virginia - the part of Virginia that Richmond forgets all about until time to collect taxes. The state, like the federal government, does not mind taking our money a bit, but has a tendency to forget who we are when it's time to deliver on any promises or payouts made to us. For example, the State kept well over half of the money the Federal government gave it that it was supposed to pass on to me during the pandemic, just pocketed the money and swore they didn't know me. Similarly, the Federal government suddenly didn't know me when it came time to pay out any "pandemic relief" payments - THEY actually sent me a letter that said "we don't know who you are, so we ain't getting up off your money". Funny how they always know who I am when they are TAKING money, though.

Like all primitive tribesmen, we get short shrift out here in the hinterlands when fast talkers come around. Bunch of thieves.

BUT - you are not far off with mention of "the Amazon". For most of the year, with the exception only of deep winter, this place is practically indistinguishable from just about any other rain forest biome on Earth - to include triple canopy selva in places - and this locality is one of the top 5 areas on the planet for "biodiversity". That has it's moments... but also it's apparent drawbacks...

ETA: one of the first exploratory expeditions into these mountains, in the late 1600's or early 1700's, records that one of the expedition members was "stung" by a "mountain spider" and was sick for 3 days or so, so the creepy crawlies here are not a new phenomena brought about by alleged "climate change" - they've ALWAYS been here.

.

[Ninurta]

I was thinking I had a picture of my wood building spider but couldn’t find one. So I asked my husband if he did and lucky for y’all he had several. It looks like it could be a good companion for @"Ninurta"s spider.

Good Lord! I hope that's not a fallen church bell that monster is perched on!

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