Immutable Laws

[727Sky]

IMMUTABLE LAWS

 1 . Law of Mechanical Repair
After your hands become coated with grease, your nose will begin to
itch and you'll have to pee.

2.Law of Gravity
Any tool, nut, bolt, screw, when dropped, will roll to the least
accessible place in the universe.

3.Law of Probability
The probability of being watched is directly proportional to the
stupidity of your act.

4.Law of Random Numbers
If you dial a wrong number, you never get a busy signal; someone always answers.

5.Variation Law
If you change lines (or traffic lanes), the one you were in will
always move faster than the one you are in now.

6.Law of the Bath
When the body is fully immersed in water, the telephone will ring.

7.Law of Close Encounters
The probability of meeting someone you know INCREASES dramatically
when you are with someone you don't want to be seen with.

8.Law of the Result
When you try to prove to someone that a machine won't work, IT WILL!!!

9.Law of Biomechanics
The severity of the itch is inversely proportional to the reach.

10.Law of the Theaters & Sports Arenas -
At any event, the people whose seats are furthest from the aisle,
always arrive last. They are the ones who will leave their seats
several times to go for food, beer, or the toilet and who leave early
before the end of the performance or the game is over.

11.The Coffee Law
As soon as you sit down to a cup of hot coffee, your boss will ask you
to do something which will last until the coffee is cold.

12.Murphy's Law of Lockers
If there are only 2 people in a locker room, they will have adjacent lockers.

13.Law of Physical Surfaces
The chances of an open-faced sandwich landing face down on a floor are
directly correlated to the newness and cost of the carpet or rug.

17.Law of Commercial Marketing Strategy-
As soon as you find a product that you really like, they will stop
making it OR the store will stop selling it!

18.Doctors' Law
If you don't feel well, make an appointment to go to the doctor, by
the time you get there, you'll feel better. But don't make an
appointment and you'll stay sick.

If you don't forward this to your friends, your belly button will
unscrew and your butt will fall off.  Really... It's true. I read it
on the Internet!

[Tarzan the apeman.]

The second one happened to me the other day. We are remodeling and we needed to take a face-off of an electrical outlet. Anyway, there is a small hole in the floor for cable, and gravity was so powerful that it pulled the screw right in. I am wondering if it is the start of a black hole. Gravity Sucks !!!

[Mystic Wanderer]

TRUE! 

Especially this one... Happens to me all the time.

17.Law of Commercial Marketing Strategy-
As soon as you find a product that you really like, they will stop
making it OR the store will stop selling it!

[senona]

2.Law of Gravity
Any tool, nut, bolt, screw, when dropped, will roll to the least
accessible place in the universe..

Yessssssss!!!
EVERY. SINGLE. FRIGGIN. TIME. 





3.Law of Probability
The probability of being watched is directly proportional to the
stupidity of your act.

TRUTH       





5.Variation Law

If you change lines (or traffic lanes), the one you were in will
always move faster than the one you are in now.



For crying out loud, I still change lines/lanes even tho I know better. smdh. 






8.Law of the Result

When you try to prove to someone that a machine won't work, IT WILL!!!


ROFLMAO........................... always my store manager. 
And Matthew lets me know that he "never has a problem getting it to work." (((insert sigh)))  





9.Law of Biomechanics

The severity of the itch is inversely proportional to the reach.


Think we can all relate to that....or at least I can 





13.Law of Physical Surfaces
The chances of an open-faced sandwich landing face down on a floor are
directly correlated to the newness and cost of the carpet or rug.

Like Law #2 --- EVERY. SINGLE. TIME.    







If you don't forward this to your friends, your belly button will
unscrew and your butt will fall off.  Really... It's true. I read it
on the Internet!!


Uh oh ..... *looks down at belly button*

I can't afford for my azz to fall off.
Guess I better forward this 'cuz the internet never lies.