How to get to Heaven from Ireland

[727Sky]

How to get to Heaven from Ireland

 A true Story from an Irish Sunday School Teacher.
 I was testing children in my Dublin Sunday school class to see if they understood the concept of getting to heaven.
'I asked them, ' If I sold my house and my car, had a big garage sale and gave all my money to the church, would that get me into heaven?'
'NO!' the children answered.
'If I cleaned the church every day, mowed the garden, and kept everything tidy, would that get me into heaven?'
Again, the answer was 'NO!'
'If I gave sweets to all the children, and loved my husband, would that get me into heaven?'
Again, they all answered 'NO!'
I was just bursting with pride for them. I continued, 'Then how can I get into heaven?'
A little boy shouted out: 'YUV GOTTA BE FOOKN' DEAD.'
It's a curious race, the Irish.
Brings a tear to the eye, doesn't it? 

[guohua]

[gordi]

Getting to Heaven from Ireland??
That's easy...

Head West. It's not far.

 

G

[dadmansabode]

Um, getting to Heaven is the same path no matter where you are

Jesus: but as many as received him .. to them he gave the right to become children of God .. even to those who believe in his name
who were born .. not of blood nor of the will of the flesh nor of the will of man . . . but of God ......... John 1:12-13

[Wallfire]

Heaven is a liter of good whisky and a dear friend to drink it with, heaven is good food with good friends and a good whisky, heaven is what you make it as long as it has whisky. Hell is the next morning when you have to go to work and there is no whisky.

[dadmansabode]

Heaven is a liter of good whisky and a dear friend to drink it with, heaven is good food with good friends and a good whisky, heaven is what you make it as long as it has whisky. Hell is the next morning when you have to go to work and there is no whisky.

Man, have you ever got some surprises coming 

the rich man and Lazarus 

a testimony of one surprised to be in Hell .. part 1 of 5 .. Recorded Apr 23 2006 

a testimony of one surprised to be in Hell .. part 2 of 5 .. Recorded Apr 30 2006 

a testimony of one surprised to be in Hell .. part 3 of 5 .. Recorded May 07 2006 

a testimony of one surprised to be in Hell .. part 4 of 5 .. Recorded May 14 2006 

a testimony of one surprised to be in Hell .. part 5 of 5 .. Recorded May 21 2006 

Matthew 16:19 .. Jesus: now there was a rich man .. and he habitually dressed in purple and fine linen .. joyously living in splendor every day
16:20 .. and a poor man named Lazarus was laid at his gate .. covered with sores
16:21 .. and longing to be fed with the crumbs which were falling from the rich man’s table .. besides .. even the dogs were coming and licking his sores
16:22 .. now the poor man died and was carried away by the angels to Abraham’s bosom .. and the rich man also died and was buried
16:23 .. In Hades he lifted up his eyes .. being in torment .. and saw Abraham far away and Lazarus in his bosom
16:24 .. and he cried out and said . . . Father Abraham .. have mercy on me .. and send Lazarus so that he 
......... may dip the tip of his finger in water and cool off my tongue .. 
......... for I am in agony in this flame
16:25 .. but Abraham said . . . child .. remember that during your life you received your good things .. and likewise Lazarus bad things .. 
......... but now he is being comforted here .. and you are in agony
16:26 .. and besides all this .. between us and you there is a great chasm fixed .. so that those who wish to come over from here to you will not be able .. 
......... and that none may cross over from there to us
16:27 .. and he said . . . then I beg you .. father .. that you send him to my father’s house
16:28 .. for I have five brothers .. in order that he may warn them .. so that they will not also come to this place of torment
16:29 .. but Abraham said . . . they have Moses and the Prophets .. let them hear them
16:30 .. but he said . . . no .. father Abraham .. but if someone goes to them from the dead .. they will repent
16:31 .. but he said to him . . . If they do not listen to Moses and the Prophets .. they will not be persuaded even if someone rises from the dead

Full context

[dadmansabode]

A little boy shouted out: 'YUV GOTTA BE FOOKN' DEAD.

lol .... those who die the first death go to Heaven ... the second death? < not so much

[guohua]

A little boy shouted out: 'YUV GOTTA BE FOOKN' DEAD.

lol .... those who die the first death go to Heaven ... the second death? < not so much

I have my Ancestors that I communicate with and are my watchers that say that the Dead (Spirits) can stay or go to another Plane or be reborn.
Heaven,,,, well they think this may be the other Plane or Dimension and those Spirits can transverse back and forth if they wish to visit or just cause mischief.

BUT,, the Little Boy Was Right,,,,, You Do Have To be Fooooooken Dead!

[Ninurta]

Getting to Heaven from Ireland??
That's easy...

Head West. It's not far.

 

G

Are you sure you meant WEST?


.

[Ninurta]

Heaven is a liter of good whisky and a dear friend to drink it with, heaven is good food with good friends and a good whisky, heaven is what you make it as long as it has whisky. Hell is the next morning when you have to go to work and there is no whisky.

There's no whiskey where you work?

What kind of barbarians do you work for?

Even communists had whiskey!


.

[Ninurta]

Heaven is a liter of good whisky and a dear friend to drink it with, heaven is good food with good friends and a good whisky, heaven is what you make it as long as it has whisky. Hell is the next morning when you have to go to work and there is no whisky.

Man, have you ever got some surprises coming 

I'll bet you dollars against donuts that we ALL have some surprises coming.


.

[gordi]

Are you sure you meant WEST?


.

No.
(but I was very drunk...)
ROFL

G

[Wallfire]

Its a funny thing, but many moons ago I tried something. It was to take full responsibility for my actions.
Now this might seem easy, but think about it, to be responsible for everything you do, the good and the bad, to think about things before you do them and to understand to take responsibility that you have not foreseen. 
If you try this for a year you might understand ones need for religion, and maybe a greater understanding of ones soul.
I now understand ( and I stress this is only for me, what other people find may be different) that religion was used so I did not have to face the truth of who I was, and what I did.
Now I feel free and have for the best part of 30 years, no religion or God in my life, I dont spend all my time thinking of responsibility but am aware of it. People who know me fall into about 4 different types
1. People who like me for who I am
2. Religious people who dont like me because, well I dont know and dont wast time worrying about it.
3. People who feel bad around me because they see I am much more free then they are ( people want to be free but dont want to pay the price for there freedom)
4. People who dont care one way or the other.
Perhaps the biggest thing I have understood is Im not better than anyone else and dont want to be, the only person I want to be is me.
Once again this is what I found, every person maybe finds different things.

[guohua]

Heaven is a liter of good whisky and a dear friend to drink it with, heaven is good food with good friends and a good whisky, heaven is what you make it as long as it has whisky. Hell is the next morning when you have to go to work and there is no whisky.

There's no whiskey where you work?

What kind of barbarians do you work for?

Even communists had whiskey!


.

Even communists had whiskey!
Yes We Did!