Monday nuclear flaming

[Finspiracy]

Did'ja see the story on the Raleigh Active Shooter last night? Those are the chumps you're gonna haf'ta survive.

Yeah. It is in the media here too. These things always are. And i do not know what the fuck is going on inside my head, heart and soul.

I used to dwell in these. Mass murders. School shootings. Mall shootings. Researched all the details. Every detail of those details. I attempted to get inside the mind of these shooters in order for me to understand why. The motive. Never understood any of it. Instead, it left me devastated. Broken inside. All these innocent people, victims, trying to finish their school day or do their shopping normally and safely and go home. And they never went home anymore...

Then these kept on coming and coming and coming. Every week, a new mass shooting. And i researched. Then i stopped. I still read the headlines. Like "6 people killed, 14 wounded in shooting in place X" And i feel almost nothing. Like... Of course i wish this shit did not happen. Anywhere. Ever. I feel bad that innocent people have to suffer. But basically, i feel nothing. Somewhat worrying. Thinking that i have become a cold monster or something.

I have been trying to master the art of feeling nothing. But this was not exactly what i had in mind.