Quote:Mohammad’s 'Divine' Sexual Revelations

By Blake Sawyer
http://www.royalvelvetnow.com
12-12-17

 

Let me see if I have this straight:
The Koran was written by Mohammad.
The Koran says (Surah 33:21) that Mohammad’s life is the standard of conduct for anyone who has hope in Allah.
The Koran says (Surah 4:3) that Muslims are allowed up to 4 wives. Yet Mohammad had 11, or more wives, depending on which ‘expert’ on Mohammad’s life you source. Hmmmmmm? So how DID this happen?
Mohammad “received” a divine revelation that he, and ONLY he, could have as many wives as he wanted. He made sure everyone knew about this divine epiphany, putting it in the Koran in Surah 33:50.
One day, one of Mohammad’s many wives found Mohammad having sex with the slave girl. He promised, actually swore an oath to his wives, that this would stop. But it didn’t. He liked having sex with the slave girl. So how did he ‘get out’ of this jam? Another “divine” revelation. This one, directly from Allah himself.
In Surah 66: 1,2 Allah tells Mohammad that it is OK to break his oath, because, well he is Allah and Mohammad is his prophet and Allah would never deny Mohammad sex with anyone.
Then there is the well-known story of Zaid, Mohammad’s adopted son. He had a gorgeous wife named Zaynab. One day Mohammad went over to visit Zaid and ran into Zaynab. I bet you can already guess what happened with this one. Yep, while Mohammad was wide-eyed gazing upon this voluptuous beauty he had a “divine” revelation.
This one is found in Surah 33:37. It says you are allowed to marry the divorced wives of your adopted sons. And therefore Zaid, being the good adopted son that he was, divorced Zaynab, so Mohammad could marry her.
There are so many more “divine” sexual revelations to tell, but I will end with this one. This is for all of you older women who fear being dumped by your husbands for a more youthful babe.
One of Mohammad’s many wives was named Sauda. The older she got, well, let’s just say the wrinkles appeared and she gained “some” weight. Mohammad was not happy. During the bedding rotation of sleeping with his wives, he dreaded the time with Sauda. He was getting ready to divorce her. (NOTE: The old idioms about wisdom is going to pop up here, so hold on. This does not turn out like you think it would.) If Sauda gets divorced she will have nothing, even LESS than nothing. So Sauda devises a plan. She goes to Mohammad and tells him that if he does not divorce her, she will give him permission to sleep with his favorite (and more attractive) wife, Aisha, during Sauda’s ‘turn’ in bed with Mohammad.
Mohammad couldn’t have been more happy. Nor could Allah. Because this whole scenario is found in the Koran, in Surah 4:128.
Of course, we could have our own divine revelation about this topic. But what could be better than having “God’s” permission to have sex with anyone and everyone you want to, whenever you want to, with God cheering you on? And don’t forget, Allah has 70 virgins waiting for you in Islamic ‘heaven’ to have eternal sex with!
Ahhh, Islam. The religion of divine sex revelations.

http://www.rense.com/general96/mohamdivsex.html

It was always about the p*ssy! That's what's on most men's minds!!

I think we can safely assume Allah is a male because he thinks like a man would.
In fact, the book was written by males who perceive their environment through a male's perspective
and the writings seem to generally benefit males.

Males are the dominant gender in Islamic society and if it wasn't for the need to eat cooked food,
I think goats may have had a prominent position in the writings instead.

Isn't it strange that a deity that rules over universes of all styles, understands only males needs and
ignores the females?! One would almost think that a male had made-up the whole...
No, it wouldn't be diverse to say it.

Seems to me islam is all about sex. 
KILL
RAPE
OPPRESS WOMEN
RAPE CHILDREN
and you will get into paradise where 72 virgins wait for you.
Its all about sex for the man, and they even use FGM so they dont have to worry about having to please the woman

http://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-...camel.html

you will get into paradise where 72 virgins wait for you

Actually, 'Virgins' is a Quranic mistranslation ... 
the actual word is 'Virginians' .... as in: "Lookie there Jeb, that one's sure got heem a purdy mouth" ... (light banjo in the background)

(12-13-2017, 03:21 PM)dadmansabode Wrote: you will get into paradise where 72 virgins wait for you

Actually, 'Virgins' is a Quranic mistranslation ... 
the actual word is 'Virginians' .... as in: "Lookie there Jeb, that one's sure got heem a purdy mouth" ... (light banjo in the background)

We learn something new everyday, Dads!!!

(12-13-2017, 09:45 PM)BIAD Wrote:

(12-13-2017, 03:21 PM)dadmansabode Wrote: you will get into paradise where 72 virgins wait for you

Actually, 'Virgins' is a Quranic mistranslation ... 
the actual word is 'Virginians' .... as in: "Lookie there Jeb, that one's sure got heem a purdy mouth" ... (light banjo in the background)

We learn something new everyday, Dads!!!

For some strange reason when I read this Bonanza came to mind. Poor muslims all that is waiting them are 72 virgin Hoss ( not sure how to write the plural of Hoss)

(12-13-2017, 11:00 PM)Wallfire Wrote:

(12-13-2017, 09:45 PM)BIAD Wrote:

(12-13-2017, 03:21 PM)dadmansabode Wrote: you will get into paradise where 72 virgins wait for you

Actually, 'Virgins' is a Quranic mistranslation ... 
the actual word is 'Virginians' .... as in: "Lookie there Jeb, that one's sure got heem a purdy mouth" ... (light banjo in the background)

We learn something new everyday, Dads!!!

For some strange reason when I read this Bonanza came to mind. Poor muslims all that is waiting them are 72 virgin Hoss ( not sure how to write the plural of Hoss)

"Hoss" is the old west pronunciation of "horse". The plural of "hoss" is "hosses".

Looking at the original quotation here, "heem" sounds much more Hispanic than Hillbilly. The proper hillbilly word in that context is "hisse'f", as in "that 'un's shore got hisse'f a perdy mouf". What was quoted may be more appropriate for southern Georgia (as in "Deliverance" Georgia) than the mid to northern Appalachians.

.

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(12-13-2017, 03:21 PM)dadmansabode Wrote: you will get into paradise where 72 virgins wait for you

Actually, 'Virgins' is a Quranic mistranslation ... 
the actual word is 'Virginians' .... as in: "Lookie there Jeb, that one's sure got heem a purdy mouth" ... (light banjo in the background)

Does it make you feel especially "righteous" to insult as many people as possible in a sentence?

Over my dead body comes to mind right now, and if it's a fight your looking for I'm happy to oblige....

I got not one thing better to do than fight with a person who doesn't even know the difference between Virginia and Georgia atm.

We can start with the Appalachian people's and what they are like, then do a side by side comparison with Muslims - and what they are like.

Pro-tip, I know both intimately.  

Ready?

sense of humor anyone ?

Now now... I believe the gentleman was trying to convey the notion that ISIS folk looking for a good time - as in their 72 virgins - would likely have a difficult time rounding up that many virgins around here... and, all things considered, might not have quite the good time they were looking for.

That's what I'm choosing to believe, anyhow.

And he ain't exactly wrong - fundamentalist Muslims likely wouldn't receive the welcome they hoped for in these hyar parts... I got a shovel, and a shotgun, and don't think anyone would miss any of them that came looking. Ok, ok, my "shotgun" ain't exactly a shotgun, but it would sure throw out a pretty pattern of lead pellets at 'em, and the end result would probably be about the same... for them.

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(12-14-2017, 06:11 AM)dadmansabode Wrote: sense of humor anyone ?

Certainly not the kind you imagine yourself to have. 

I reserve my laughter for things that aren't truly sad (people going to hell), sick (your horror movie), and absolutely mischaracterizing of a people (your reference concerning the Appalachian people)

So yes, I have a lively sense of humor, but it's got nothing in common with yours, apparently.