The year 2020 hit me in the form of a bus this time

[Snarl]

That is the problem with addiction, it's very very hard to find the middle ground, boredom and being alone is also a big problem. Old friends also can drag one back into the addiction. Perhaps its all about making the addiction less destructive till its time to brake free. 
Your encounter with the bus was not caused by you, nor by your addiction, but by your reaction to your story, so a good point is to change how you react to your story, make it less self destructive.
Everyone has a story, no one just became an addict, it's how we react to the good or bad in our story, thats something all should remember.

So well said!!

All adults should be able to control themselves.