Pig Poo... The rise of the Swine...

[Rodinus]

 
Pulled from the « Annals » of the other site, this is yet another of our mishaps which happened back in 2013.
 
Sadly the below mentioned culprit has passed away, but his stench lives on to this very day…

So here we go...

It's Springtime here in the beautiful rolling hills of central France, the land of fine wine and gastronomic orgasms...

I am lucky to live smack bang in the middle of the countryside away from the stress and pollution of the city.

The birds are chirruping away and the bumble bees are buzzing from flower to flower gathering pollen...

The old Wisteria that i worked so hard on pruning this winter on the front of my house is coming into blossom, promising much awaited fragrances and pollenizing insects to bring a little joy into our hearts after these long winter months :



As well as the Wisteria, the whole garden is coming back to life : 



We are hoping for wheelbarrows full of cherries this year if the bastard sparrows and fat labrador don't get to them first!



The pond is coming back to life too with its orchestra of croaking frogs at the crack of dawn fall of night : 

 

The fields around my house are also coming back to life promising a great yield in Sunflowers and rape seed.



I consider myself and my family very lucky indeed to have the natural surroundings that we have been praised with and would never give up where we live... EVEN if we were offered 6 times the price of our house...

HOWEVER...

Yesterday we had a fantastically rather hot day with temperatures of around 26 to 28° and got the BBQ out for the first time in order to have a really good nosh up of some local produced sausages and ribs, all washed down with a nice chilled bottle or two of Touraine Rosé...

 

The cinders (we only use vine wood for BBQs) were nice and hot, the sausages and meat were on the BBQ and the Rosé was served... and we were all awaiting a great evening meal seated underneath the parasol whilst taking in the beauty of the garden and surrounding countryside under the slowly setting sun...




SUDDENLY...

From out of no-where appeared our neighbour on a massive big tractor trundling down the small road in front of our house who is a farmer and owner of the land around us... he is also a good friend :



We gave him a wave as we usually do and raised our chilled glasses of Rosé up to him and he waved cheerfully back with a wicked grin on his face...

Why the wicked grin we asked?...

AND THEN WE FOUND OUT...

It is muck spreading time!!!





Yes, thats right, the same muck that emanates from the back end of these buggers! 



Tons and tons and tons of the stuff spluttering out of the back of his muck spreader... unleashing purulent waves of pungent pig manure into the fields around our house...



ARRGGHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH.......

As we all ran, tripping and stumbling back into the house trying not to spill our glasses of chilled Rosé and also trying to stop the dribbling dogs from pinching our sausages off the BBQ our farmer neighbour cheerily waved at us as his muck spreader chugged slowly past the front of our house in the field in front splattering thick globs of pig poo all over the place! 


Needless to say, our first BBQ of the year was a total disaster...

AND TO TOP IT ALL OFF... the sausages were inedible as impregnated with the smell of PIG POO (so the dribbling hounds got them in the end!) AND we now have to live cooped up in the house with all windows shut tight for about 5 days until the smell disappears (even with all the windows shut we are reeked out), meaning that we cannot profit from the awakening garden and the beautiful scents of blooming springtime flowers!



Bastard...

Kindest smelly respects        

Rodinus