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Little Johnny is growing up
#1
Quote:A teacher asked her class how many of them were  Bernie Sanders fans. 
Not really knowing what a Bernie Sanders fan is, but wanting to be liked by the teacher, all the kids raised their hands except for Little Johnny. 
The teacher asked Little Johnny why he has decided to be different...again. 
Little Johnny said, 'Because I'm not a Bernie Sanders fan.' 
The teacher asked, 'Why aren't you a Bernie Sanders fan?' 
Johnny said, 'Because I'm a Conservative.' 
The teacher asked him why he's a Conservative. 
Little Johnny answered, 'Well, my Mom's a Conservative and my Dad's a Conservative, so I'm a Conservative.' 
Annoyed by this answer, the teacher asked, 'If your Mom was a Moron and your Dad was an idiot, what would that make you?'
 Little Johnny replied, 'A  Bernie Sanders fan.'

#2
minusculebeercheers
#3
Yes it would.  minusculethumbsup
Once A Rogue, Always A Rogue!
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#4
Good one!   tinylaughing
#5
Quote:Chuck Schumer and a few of his staff members were visiting an elementary
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> > school and the class was studying vocabulary.
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> > The teacher was in the middle of a discussion related to words, their
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> > meanings, and proper usage.
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> >
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> > The
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> > teacher asked Senator Schumer if he would like to lead the discussion
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> > on the word "Tragedy".
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> > So
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> > Mr. Schumer asked the class for an example of a "Tragedy".
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> >
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> > A
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> > little boy stood up and offered: "If my best friend, who lives on a
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> > farm, is playing in the field and a tractor runs over him and kills
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> > him, that would be a tragedy."
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> > "Incorrect," said Schumer.  "That would be an accident."
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> >
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> > A
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> > little girl raised her hand: "If a school bus carrying fifty children
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> > drove over a cliff, killing everybody inside, that would be a
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> > tragedy." "I'm afraid not", explained Schumer, "That's what we would
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> > refer to as a great loss."
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> >
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> > The
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> > room went silent - no other children volunteered.  Schumer searched
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> > the room, "Isn't there someone here who can give me an example of a
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> > tragedy?"
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> >
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> > Finally,
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> > at the back of the room, Little Johnny raised his hand and
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> > said: "If an airplane carrying you, Nancy Pelosi, Maxine Waters, Dick
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> > Durban, Adam Schiff, Richard Blumenthal, Barack Obama, and Hillary
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> > Clinton was struck by a missile and blown to smithereens, that would
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> > be a tragedy."
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> > "Fantastic,"
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> > exclaimed Schumer, "And can you tell me why that would be a tragedy?"
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> >
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> > "Well,"
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> > said Little Johnny, "It has to be a tragedy... because it certainly
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> > wouldn't be a great loss and it probably wouldn't be an unplanned
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> > accident either!"
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> >
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> > Little
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> > Johnny and his parents are now included in Robert Mueller's
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> > investigation. And both of Schumer's staff members who laughed out
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> > loud are now looking for other employment.
#6
one day in school little johnny's teacher was having the kids say a word that started with the letters of the alphabet.

every time she would say a letter little johnny's hand shot up like a rocket.

she didn't want to call on little johnny because he cussed like a sailor and she knew he would say a cuss word.

she went all the way through the alphabet until she got to R.

sure enough little johnny's hand went up.

she thought about it for a minute, couldn't think of any cuss words that started with R so she called on him.

without blinking a eye little johnny blurted out, Rat

a god damn Rat,

a god damn Rat with a dick this long (holding his hands out, like someone telling a fishing story)
#7
A teacher asks her class, "What do you want to be when you grow up?"

Little Johnny says "I wanna be a billionaire, going to the most expensive clubs, take the best bitch with me, give her a Ferrari worth over a million bucks, an apartment in Hawaii, a mansion in Paris, a jet to travel through Europe, an Infinite Visa Card and to make love to her three times a day".

The teacher, shocked and not knowing what to do with the bad behavior of the child, decides not to give importance to what he said and then continues the lesson.

"And you, Susie? " the teacher asks.

Susie says "I wanna be Johnny's bitch."

tinybiggrin
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