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HUNTER CLAIMS HE WAS SEXUALLY ASSAULTED BY A SASQUATCH
#1
tinywhat Well, this is a new one on me!  Poor guy!


Quote:Darrel Whitaker, from Glenwood Springs in Colorado, claims a sasquatch attacked him and attempted to rape him while he was walking in the woods.

The 57-year old man was walking to his hunting cabin on Sunday, to see if it had suffered any damage during the winter.
All of a sudden, a large “gorilla-like” creature dropped from a tree in front of him punched him in the face.
“It was at least 8-foot tall and it’s punches hurt like hell! I was knocked right out at the first blow!”

While Mr. Whitaker was trying to recover from the attack, the large humanoid creature began to tear his clothes while letting out some terrifying howls.

“When I regained consciousness, he had already torn my pants and was tearing through my underwear. I stabbed him in the shoulder with my hunting knife, and that made him run away.”

Mr. Whitaker immediately reported the attack to both the Glenwood Springs Police Department (GSPD) and the Colorado Parks and Wildlife agency, and a joint investigation has been launched.

[Image: hunterinterview.jpg]

Quote:
Quote:Investigators found some extremely large footprints on the site, which they believe are those of the aggressor.
Darrel Whitaker is convinced that the creature who attacked him was a sasquatch, but the GSPD investigators say it’s more probable that the attacker is simply a particularly large and hairy man.
They are currently interrogating nearby residents to see if anyone noticed an individual corresponding to the description of the suspect.
According to the victim, the attacker measure around 8-foot tall and is extremely hairy. He has brown hair, dark brown eyes and extremely large feet.
If you possess any information concerning the suspect, please contact the Glenwood Springs Police Department or the Colorado Parks and Wildlife agency.

Source


Well, that takes the cake! Must have been one of those modern day sasquatches that likes men better than females.  Guess even the critters are trying to stay up to date with humanity. mediumnotlooking




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#2
Are we sure it wasn't a female sasquatch? Did he see it's manly or girly parts? That wasn't listed in the description...
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#3
Maybe,,,, maybe a Homo-Squatchsexual????  smallroflmao

I'm Sorry, but I think this guy was hitting the jug a little to hard.
Wouldn't someone be asking for that knife to get a DNA sample from the blood or hair?
Once A Rogue, Always A Rogue!
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#4
(08-10-2017, 01:06 AM)guohua Wrote: Maybe,,,, maybe a Homo-Squatchsexual????  smallroflmao

I'm Sorry, but I think this guy was hitting the jug a little to hard.
Wouldn't someone be asking for that knife to get a DNA sample from the blood or hair?

If they didn't, they missed a great opportunity.  Yes, I agree.  He's probably just looking for some fame. I think I've heard of him before.




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#5
(08-10-2017, 01:03 AM)Spirit Scribe Wrote: Are we sure it wasn't a female sasquatch? Did he see it's manly or girly parts? That wasn't listed in the description...

I think everyone is just assuming it's a male because of it's height.




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#6
(08-10-2017, 01:03 AM)Spirit Scribe Wrote: Are we sure it wasn't a female sasquatch? Did he see it's manly or girly parts? That wasn't listed in the description...
He didn't say anything about seeing Big Hairy Titties,,,,,,Maybe, Maybe it was a Trans-Sasquatchsexual having a bad Harmon moment.
Once A Rogue, Always A Rogue!
[Image: attachment.php?aid=936]
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#7
(08-10-2017, 01:14 AM)guohua Wrote:
(08-10-2017, 01:03 AM)Spirit Scribe Wrote: Are we sure it wasn't a female sasquatch? Did he see it's manly or girly parts? That wasn't listed in the description...
He didn't say anything about seeing Big Hairy Titties,,,,,,Maybe, Maybe it was a Trans-Sasquatchsexual having a bad Harmon moment.

giantlaughingatyou




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#8
This dubious tale is a re-vamp from May of this year.
By stating it happened on Sunday, it implies the alleged assault to place fairly recently,
but other reports show that Mr. 'Squatch-Magnet' actually met his blind-date on anytime
before the 12th May 2017.

The Anorak -12th May 2017.

HuntTalk -May 2017.

That'sNonsense.Com-9th May 2017.

However, if a series on The History Channel comes out titled 'Taking Bigfoot' then we'll know
whether it's true or not. 
tinysurprised
[Image: attachment.php?aid=953]
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#9
(08-10-2017, 09:58 AM)BIAD Wrote: This dubious tale is a re-vamp from May of this year.
By stating it happened on Sunday, it implies the alleged assault to place fairly recently,
but other reports show that Mr. 'Squatch-Magnet' actually met his blind-date on anytime
before the 12th May 2017.

The Anorak -12th May 2017.

HuntTalk -May 2017.

That'sNonsense.Com-9th May 2017.

However, if a series on The History Channel comes out titled 'Taking Bigfoot' then we'll know
whether it's true or not. 
tinysurprised
Was That,,,"Taking Bigfoot or Dating Bigfoot"?  smallroflmao
Once A Rogue, Always A Rogue!
[Image: attachment.php?aid=936]
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